For weeks I have found this trip was not yet my own, I was trying to see all that I could and still make it in time for planned talks, news programs, and visits…all were lovely and a blast but I had yet to detach the way I originally thought would happen on a solo adventure such as this….until this week!
As I was leaving Oregon and going into Northern California I started to feel everything on a rawer level. The changing of the leaves seemed more vibrant, the air more crisp and as I contemplated why, I realized for the first time there is nothing – not a specific time to be anywhere, nobody is waiting on – or expecting me…it is just me and my “helmet time.”
The next day I started to feel my emotions even deeper – I rode through the twisty mountain roads just me, Amelia, nature, and Snap Judgement podcast. I love this NPR program and back home on Sundays at 5pm I rewound to 1950’s and turned off everything but my radio program…I sat like an 80 year old grandmother and knitted or puzzled as I listen to the artfully crafted program. It was powerful then but now with just my helmet and the sounds and power of stories and interviews of 5 podcasts I laughed, and cried silent tears, and I smiled in the simple joys that I was feeling by letting myself go!